First Meetings

This is the bulk of an email I sent to a sweet friend after she visited us. It was one of the first times I’ve seen Daniel through another’s eyes and it stung my heart in both good and hard ways, because my friend’s eyes are eyes full of love and acceptance. Anyway – with many introductions in the future, I thought I’d just go ahead and share this email here too:

When you came to bring me the baby carrier and a hug, I had been looking forward to seeing you. I wanted to introduce to you and show you my treasure, my newly adopted Bulgarian boy, the little boy for whom I’ve crossed oceans. I’m proud of him. He’s beautiful. He’s easy to love. He’s full of potential. You’ve loved him and supported him from a distance and I was looking forward to that introduction.

But then the brokenness of adoption and his first years pushed themselves into the front. I walked into the room where he was with you and saw his tiny pale body and I was shocked again by his smallness and clear lack of health. I thought to introduce him, but remembered that he is not ready for introductions. I watched him knock things on his teeth and lay on his back and wished I could show you the other parts of him, but those sweet insides of his heart are protected and will bloom when they’re ready, not on command.

So it was a meeting of love and a meeting of grief when you came. Thank you for loving us through both. Daniel is a very loved tiny boy and I’m lucky to be forefront to watching him learn and heal.