Frequent Blogger Award?

I’m blogging lots lately. Hope to bring you some pictures here soon too!

Adoption update:

Scheduled a home visit for our homestudy for Nov. 11. Looking forward to it and hoping that it all goes smoothly. Biggest fear: having any sort of misunderstanding with our social worker and her being frustrated with us and/or losing confidence in us.

Anticipating/praying/hoping to be signing an application with an adoption agency this weekend when we have time to REALLY think about it. (We have made the pre-decision to do that, but have been busy with kids and work and all that) If we are a go, then we are going to be pursuing adopting a kiddo with Down Syndrome from Eastern Europe (EE) in the country we’ve been hoping to adopt from all along who is under 2 years old. They may or may not have other needs (like heart defect, cleft lip, etc.). We do not know at what point we will have a referral for our new child… it could be at any point in the process.

If we send in the application, it will mark the beginning of the great paper chase.

Once we decide on the country and everything, we’ll need to prayerfully consider the travel arrangements. The travel will happen some time down the road, but we’ll need to decide if Anna and Maggie are coming with us or not and all that. If they do, we’ll be needing somebody to come with us (expenses paid) to help. Exciting! Expensive! Still exciting!

hahahaha

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Praising God!

Both the little boys who we have almost committed to at different points (who have a big piece of my heart) HAVE FAMILIES committed to bringing them home! I am so thankful! I am excited! I am glad that we did not adopt them… we weren’t ready… God had a plan for them! Yippee!!! You can see their faces on the “Rescued Children” page at Reeces Rainbow page (which is mid renovation right now, but looking nice!)

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Christmas

If anybody has any old cassettes of “GT and the Halo Express” or “Psaltry” or any of those other kids Bible sets, that would be so fun to have in our car! CDs would be good for in our house too. 🙂

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Appointments from God

I feel like last night’s trip to the ER was a good allegory/analogy for this whole last week of being sick.

Some background: Maggie got sick Friday night with fever and crying. Everybody else got it shortly after. The girls hit a low point about Tuesday and we took them to the Dr. We hit a high point and felt a little better. The doctor prescribed antibiotics for Anna, because her lungs were wet and she had a mild ear infection. Anna improved quickly. By Saturday, I had been in some pretty severe sinus pain for days and Maggie still had a fever. We went in to the doctor again on Saturday (Pediatrician for Maggie, Urgent care for me). We both got antibiotics prescribed. Monday, I was feeling mucho better – hooray!!! – and Maggie still had a fever that ranged from 100-103.5 under the arm. The advice nurse said that we ought to go in, even though the office was closed… that meant the emergency room or urgent care. Last night we went to the ER.

We got there at before 4:30pm sometime and got a leg band for Maggie. I was happy to be doing something instead of worrying at home that we ought to have gone in. She was still drinking lots of milk, so I wasn’t too worried about her despite the fever. I knew we were in for a wait, but hoped it wouldn’t be too bad. Now, on to divine appointments. We were in the waiting room until we left untreated at 7:45 pm with a feverish, half-sleeping baby and a wound up (cute) little girl. I saw three waves of patients come in, wait and be seen. Now, I don’t usually feel a sense of being in God’s will. But this whole sickness and even last night’s seemingly wasted trip to the ER felt very divinely arranged. Maybe it was everybody praying for us. Maybe God has specifically used this sickness to do good things with us.

I felt prompted to talk with other waiting patients as we all sat in mutual misery of one sort or another. I had an adorable, flushed, naked except for her diaper baby leaning warmly and limply on my chest as I walked around, so I definitely was not intimidating. I met so many people, some needing to talk, some wanting to talk and some not interested in talking. An older lady was in for broken ribs. A lady talked about her kids and grandkids (and a teenage granddaughter who wouldn’t clean her room). An older man and wife (he was in for a fall) got many smiles from watching Anna dance and play. The lady’s purse was shiny pink with brass spots and hardware all over it. Anna took a picture of it (and many other things) with the cell phone camera and made us all smile. A mom was in for being sick with three of her kids, ages 2-10? She was kind and not very talkative, but it was nice to be a mom near another mom. I felt for her as she had to wait so long while feeling dizzy with her three kids to keep together.

Her kids kept complaining about wanting dinner (it was after 5 by this point) and Brian and Anna were bringing back dinner. I decided we ought to eat where they didn’t have to watch us – that meant moving to the smaller side of the waiting room, placing us in chairs much closer to the few people waiting there. THere was an adult man waiting there who had Down Syndrome. I asked him if he’d been waiting long and who he was waiting for. He said he’d been waiting a long time for his roommate “Spence” to come back from a MRI of his head (he’d hit his head on the door and was bandaged up). I think the first thing he said to me though, was, “I’m kinda scared.” He almost whispered it to the floor as he swung his legs on the seat just like a ten year old boy worried about their friend. The next half an hour we talked – about him, where he works, how he got engaged last week (Oh my, I thought it was so sweet that he bought rings out of a candy machine at Fred Meyer – but he will buy real rings someday), they will get married in about two years he says, they both work together at a miniature horse farm. He was worried about his friend and we talked about that some. It was a pleasure to meet him and he left not long after. I’m glad he didn’t wait alone.

The admitting staff were friendly. Maggie got through triage and admitting… but we never got into a room. We talked with people, sat bleary-eyed and stared, traded Maggie back and forth as we got tired. Brian and I didn’t get to talk to each other much, hold each other, talk about the events of the day or much of anything else before we rolled on home and tucked the kids into bed. But the day didn’t feel wasted. The dishes, my desk, most things here are in a state of disaster (only doing essentials… that we remember).

So how is the trip to the ER like the whole 11 day sickness that we’ve had? Sometimes you don’t slow down without being forced to. I think that being sick has specifically helped us on our adoption journey. One, I was not impatient or worried as I waited for emails. Two, I would not have noticed that I forgot to send a particular email (was hanging out in my draft folder). There have been a number of events that marked “steps forward” in the process of deciding what to do. We have very deliberately held onto our faith and conviction that we are meant to adopt; if the Enemy wanted us to be too overwhelmed to adopt a waiting soul, then the ploy hasn’t worked.

Let me share the good news about what we’ve learned about adoption:
There ARE children under two with Down Syndrome waiting in the country we have originally considered.
The other agencies that we were worried had led us wrong seem to be totally in the clear after learning additional information about the process in the EE country we’ve been researching.
Other countries have also opened up due to us thinking the original country might not be a good fit for us. It is exciting to feel like there are several good choices to choose between instead of feeling pinched into something we’re not ready for.
The other countries are: two other’s in EE that shouldn’t be named on blogs and Ghana.
We are still very happy with the agency we’re working with.

We need to prayerfully consider all that we have learned. We need to talk about how we feel about a child who would need surgery sometime (cleft palate, heart surgery, etc.). Not sure when we’ll have time for that, but all this time, I’ve felt God’s providing hand.

Thanking God that I rested last night.

Thanking God for loving us.

Praying Maggie gets well soon.

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Adoption Update

I can’t remember how much I’ve updated and where we were at last time I shared. In case you didn’t know, we’ve all had some kind of cold bug that has had us down with fevers and sore throats since Friday or so. We seem to be on the mend, but maybe it’s the beautiful morning sunshine just tricking me. Hopefully we really are on the mend and will be bouncing around like normal soon! Poor Maggie… I think I maybe ought to go give her some tylenol and try this nap over again. Be right back.

Ok, I think half of that went down her cheek and onto my robe and the rest got swallowed.

Where was I? We decided to step back from the children we were hoping to choose between, one of whom we had expected to bring home. Not an easy decision. Still feeling the whiplash of that one. Decided to look into adopting a little (ADORABLE) boy from Belize in a pilot program of an agency we were unfamiliar with. We are still not confident with the agency that is trying to help him find a family.

Our concerns are:

…The lack of transparency we’ve encountered. It seems like hard work to get detailed information about the inner-working process. Like the actual names of their contacts, the names of the people they’re working with, exactly what and who and when and how. I want to know EVERY piece of this puzzle, not just the parts they think an adoptive family needs to know.

…The negative reviews we’ve ready from other adoptive families who’ve used this agency. Albeit, this is an agency that works with lots of families and SOME families are bound to have rougher times than others. Mistakes are bound to happen. However, the complaints that concerned us are ones that claimed that the agency was not forthright with them about important details or that claimed that they’d “fallen between the cracks” and not gotten attention. With the program in Belize being a new program, I need to have absolute confidence that our agency will stick with us… and that they are the experts. I’m not convinced that this agency is confident or educated about their own programs. There, I said it. I hope that the little boy who is waiting finds a family. 🙁 If you’re interested, Allison at One World Adoptions would like to bring him home! Jayson’s information can be found in the 0-2 year old waiting children section of reecesrainbow.org. He is healthy and adorable. And waiting.

For awhile, I felt really disoriented and frustrated. From almost choosing a child to bring home to not even having an agency and no idea where to turn next.

Time passed.

One piece of clarity returned. We did have an agency that we trusted. They’d been thoroughly helpful and transparent and educated and had experience. We have found almost no negative reviews of them at all. They are a smaller agency. So we looked up their information and what countries they work with. Then we drafted an email to them again. It said something like this:

If we were to wait for a child in Eastern Europe in the country we have been hoping to adopt from… who is 0-2 years old and has Down Syndrome, how long would the wait be?
What other country programs could we work with, considering our age and travel restrictions?

Answer:
She will check with their attorney/representative in country to get advice on how to answer the first question.
Russia and Ghana are programs we could consider.

Our response:
Great, we’re interested in hearing what it would look like to continue the process in the original country.
We are intimidated by Russia. Both its fairly long travel requirements and some of the in-country process that is stressful (appearing in court, etc.). Russia is also higher cost.
Tell us more about Ghana.

Answer:
Ghana is a pilot (new) program. They have waiting children ages 1-14 with and without special needs, singles and sibling groups. The process takes about a year. Travel is minimal (two very short trips) and we’re encouraged to stay longer than required to get to know the children and culture better. Cost is lower.

So right now we’re researching Ghana. We’re waiting on word about Eastern Europe. And we’re not really considering Russia at this point, although they do have many infants/toddlers with DS waiting.

Maggie is STILL crying. I’ve gone in and tucked her in innumerable times. Being sick really messes with routine. Before getting sick, she ALWAYS rested well right now. I think it may be time to pick her up and try again later. Poor thing. By the way, she was 17 lbs. 4 oz. She is quite skinny. I think that’s about the 5th percentile. As soon as she gets her appetite back after being sick, I am going to do my best to stuff her with yummy, high calorie foods.

Please continue praying for us!

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