When people see my girls as we’re out and about, a common comment is, “They look so much like their Mama!” (Do you think it’s the angelic, distracted expression above or the goofy face with the tongue hanging out like Maggie loves to make?)
Yes, they may resemble me in some ways. They are similar to each other in many ways. Baby photos especially can make them look the same. But in personality, they have very little in common.
An example is how they approached the big play structure we went to the other day (indoor!). Anna was nervous, but focused. She never really seemed to get a sense of where she was in the maze and focused on surmounting each challenge as it presented itself. If we pressured her to try something new (even a suggestion is “pressure” to this girl when she’s feeling insecure), then she would balk and retreat to the section for the youngest children until she felt ready to try again on her own terms. Every now and then she’d run to the play “cars” area without us, feeling freed up by the distance between us and her so that she could have the freedom to experiment on her own. She didn’t need to look to us for reassurance. She knew we were there to help her if she was hurt or stuck… but she definitely had a drive to accomplish and discover on her own..
Maggie was neither nervous or focused. She was excited and wired and full of energy. She stopped to look around and notice the pictures on the walls, the light fixtures, the whole picture. She’d be running full tilt and stop abruptly to stare at the big painting on the wall. She developed pretty quickly a sense of where in the building and structure she was. (I think) Despite this greater understanding, it wouldn’t have surprised me for her to trip over something immediately in front of her if she hadn’t included it in her mental picture. She needed to stay closer to us. She barreled through different obstacles with abandon (and speed), crawling under things, climbing up others and going down many of the slides completely solo. But after each one, she looked up at us for approval. Anna would focus on doing something right half the time and only look to us for approval when she herself approved of how she’d done something.
Both of them were excited and proud when they achieved something and just swelled up with self accomplishment when they “showed us how to get somewhere.” Anna was proud of her bravery in going down the big slide. Maggie just liked the thrill of the drop. They both LOVE special time with mommy and daddy.
I am much more like Anna. I like to focus and succeed. I fight a fear of failure and sometimes overreact to the expectations of others. I admire the courage and determination in my daughter, Anna. I compare Maggie so much more to Brian. Being able to think “out of sequence” is foreign to my own mind. Being better able to live in the moment and enjoy things without so much fear.
Oh how I love these girls! My heart just expands to think of them.
I am eager to find out what James is like!
Tonight the girls were in the bath, “playing” together (read annoying each other) and I was in the living room ignoring them. The chorus of little voices rose to a crescendo in unison: “PAAA PAAA!” So I had to go look. I asked why they were calling and Maggie says, “AAH!” with a wide mouth grin and Anna says, “Maggie is being too loud.” Well I wonder who taught her that?